Blog to The World

Durable relationships are not easy to find. It is not that they do not exist but they do not receive the attention quite in the same way a bad relationship does. The cops are not called out for a domestic dispute in the dawn of day. Screaming and throwing of furniture do not upset the household. Bruises and scratches are not hid beneath make-up or long sleeved sweaters. Durable relationships might suffer ups and downs but are a far different cry than the ones witnessed on reality television shows that frequently are centered around broken relationships.

Dating or marrying does not mean that things will always be safe sailing. Durable relationships are a work in progress that grow and develop day by day. People change with time and so must their relations with the others. Love can be considered an art form and if the paint becomes blemished there are people that can help right the mistakes. A marriage counselor can do this. A mediator, a close impartial friend or even a relative can help bring two people closer together. All it takes is time and willing.

Dating relationship advice is sometimes akin to bringing in a bad message. That old saying about killing the messenger is applicable all too often when it comes to sharing advice to a friend about his or her current partner. Too much advice can make a person seem fagged and anti relationship whereas not enough and a body seems faint.
Pals want to be frank with each other. They want to be able to entrust and in turn receive advice but what does a person do when a friend is asking for dating relationship advice and the advice would be anything but pleasant? Is this time for frankness or is it one where it might be better off to be kid-glove and evasive?
Therapists and relationship experts agree that a direct question from the confused friend should not be treated with evasion. He or she will immediately begin to worry and the problem can grow exponentially. If the particular question is an uncomfortable one, then turn it around on the friend. Ask him or her if what they “feel” is right and tells them that they might need to reflect on it for a while.
When all else fails and the friend requires a definitive answer to a problem they are having, tell them the truth. Chances are they will still want the advice anyway, even after the warning, but at least the opportunity for protest was given. Be careful on how the advice is formulated. Make it very clear that the advice is really opinion only and that all of the facts are not available.

Developing relationships takes time and diligence. Single parents, people concentrating on their career or individuals seeking specific qualities in a mate often find them on the losing end of the relationship game if they limit themselves to people who they would ordinarily interact with. The coming out of the Internet gave people a way to communicate without the pressures of chin wag and idle chit chat.
Ten years ago there was a stigma attached to internet dating. It was generally looked upon as something people did for “hook ups” or were for “losers” who could not get a date in real life. Nothing could possibly be further from the truth. Internet dating was and still is a great way for developing relationships.
One particular website devoted to love, dating and marriage is Eharmony. They take the idea of compatibility and match people based on a series of questions the individual answers. This approach to developing relationships is on the assumption that searching through endless personal ads is often a unavailing strive due to discovering that the other person is not compatible.

Developing relationships that can survive takes diligence and can sometimes be a painful process. It does not have to be. Love is one half rational and the other emotional. When combined it gives a level playing field where two people can find something they sincerely want.